Letter to Hazel

Dear, My little girl, Hazel

Well It’s five days away from my Induction Date (August 23) and It’s becoming more and more real everyday. I will really get to meet my little girl very soon. I am so excited to finally hold you in my arms. I can’t wait to hold your little hands and give you your first kisses. I have like five outfits for you to wear at the hospital. You have slippers and little bows for your hair. You are already so spoiled!

Hazel Lee will be your name. I don’t even know you yet but I do know that this name is completely perfect for you. Your dad loves the name, if I wanted to change it now he would never let me! We are giving you the middle name “Lee” because your daddy’s grandpa was named Robert Lee Shaner. Your dad was very close to him and loved him very much. I hear stories about him all the time but I never got the chance to meet him before he passed. I wish I could have, I see how much daddy loved him so much and people tell me what an amazing man he was. I also have a person that I cherish and love and her name is Norma Lee Squier. So I wanted to name you after her too. She is my grandma. She is so excited to meet you. She is the sweetest person in the world. Such a strong woman. She was paralyzed falling off a horse just months before I was born. So I have never been able to see her walk. She makes it seem like she is superwoman, she can do anything in that chair. She never complains the smallest bit about not being able to walk. She’s so caring, strong and loving. I wanted to name you after these two people because they are so important in me and your daddy’s lives that it would mean everything to them for you to pass on their names.

When I found out I was pregnant with you, I was scared and confused as what to do. I told your grandma, great grandma and daddy right away. Everyone was so supportive. So right then and there I knew everything would be okay because I had my family behind me. I told your grandpa two days after Christmas. I think he was scared for me and worried of what I was going to do. But he still supported what I wanted to do. We decided to keep you. There was no question about it that you were ours. And ours only.

Your daddy is twenty-one years old. From day one your daddy has been so excited. At times he got stressed about money and I think he was also scared about being a first time daddy. I think all men go through that. I understood so I tried as hard as I could to express to him that we could do it. He is an amazing person. He already expresses that he would do anything in the world to make you happy. From the beginning he knew that you were a girl. He wanted a girl so bad. He’s so excited to meet you and hold you in his arms. He is a perfect example of a real man. He works so hard and comes home with a smile on his face, gives me a kiss and asks, “How is my Hazel today?” I can’t express enough how much he already loves you. He always puts his arm around me and feels you kick. He talks to you and talks about all his future plans that he has for you. He wants to take you to the pet store the weekend after you are born and buy you your first pet, fishies! I guess we will see how me and you feel at that time!

Your dad has been working on your room for quite some time now. It is so beautiful. It’s exactly what I pictured for you. Green is me and daddy’s favorite color and pink is a girly color so I wanted your room to be pink and green. But it wasn’t enough just to paint it pink on two walls and green on the others. So I decided I wanted two walls to be pink and the other walls to be white with green stripes! It looks amazing. He did an awesome job! It took me awhile to pick out your bedding. I wanted something colorful but not too tacky looking. And I found the perfect one! It has butterflies, flowers, and snails on it. It’s so perfect. I also painted you some pictures that I have in your room too! I hope you love your room as much as I do!

I am nineteen years old and I am so excited to be a mommy to you. I love feeling you kick and hearing your heartbeat. My favorite thing throughout this pregnancy has been getting ultrasounds of you and having those first u/s pictures of you. We had a 4D one done but you were being very stubborn and wouldn’t let us get a good picture of your face. I know, you just want to surprise us. Your dad goes to all the appointments he can make. He loves seeing ultrasounds of you. When we found out you were a girl I really couldn’t believe it. I looked over at daddy and the grin on his face was priceless. I could tell how happy he truly was. You mean so much to me already. I’ve always wanted a little girl to dress up and have girly things in common with. I want you to know that I will always be here for you. No matter what you will always be my little girl. I want a lot of things for you in life but the number one thing is, I want you to be happy. If you feel like traveling, then travel. If you feel like taking on something that is so much bigger than you, I’ll be right there supporting you. If you want to be a star, I’ll be your biggest fan. I want you to get an education and work hard at everything you do. An education is very very important. Especially these days. You’ll find that when you put your heart into things, you get more out of it. Always show love to get love. Love people for who they are and those that don’t show love, teach them. Never hurt the ones you love. Be honest with yourself and other people. Life is very hard and it never gets any easier. So take things day by day. I just know that you are going to be so beautiful and so strong. Me and your daddy will always have your back in everything you do. My mom is my hero and I want to be yours. I was always very close to my mom. She is the most beautiful person in the world, inside and out. A mother and daughter bond is something so important. And nobody could ever replace my mommy. You are my everything, my love, my little girl. I love you Hazel Lee.

Love,

Mommy